second, if first

every time i am confronted by a question that requires a yes or no of me, i tend to create a maybe answer as backup in case the yes or no doesn't go over well. it's my little way of trying to be right even if i'm not. sometimes it works. othertimes it can be seen right through. i know i should be perfectly honest and say yes or no, but i fear becoming stuck inside of that answer. i create a reply that could go either way so the backdoor is open- i can run out it if the need be. this is inheirently a terrible thing. it keeps me from knowing exactly where i stand and it is an entirely dishonest way to represent myself to those around me. i challenge you to do what i am only now doing- lettting my yes be yes and my no be no. i am still caught by the urge to have that maybe answer on the tip of my tongue and it still slips into waiting ears. but, i want to, i need to be decisive and know where i stand with God, myself and those around me, so i am striving to make my yes mean simply yes and my no just plain no. when that day comes, i will be free of my complacency.